Physical distancing, yes. Social distancing, no. Four tools to stay connected
Now more than ever, the idea of “social distancing” is one of the most dangerous of ideas to us as a society. With the coronavirus now hitting the globe intensively, everyone is on edge. People are hoarding food and household items, looking at one another in strange ways, and milling about like nervous ants. We have never been here before.
As “social distancing” is put into place, people are told to stay home, and stand six feet away from one another. As my dear friend Judy Rough said, that is physical distancing, but it certainly is not social distancing. The first is fine. It is a temporary measure of which we can all adapt. However, the very last thing we want to do is engage in social distancing.
The pandemic of social isolation has steadily grown in the past decade. Studies have shown that feeling socially isolated is in fact so damaging to our health that it can shorten our life by seven years. It is as bad on our health as smoking 15 cigarettes per day.
This is not the time to be distant. It is the time to come together. To become deeply and authentically connected socially within your family, community and as a global unit fighting a common enemy we cannot see, prevent, cure or easily trace.
Some of you may have seen the video of the Italians singing outside their windows into the empty alleys together in spontaneous moments of solidarity. Watch it again. It is the Italian spirit at their finest.
In more good news, China has closed their last temporary hospital and health care workers were seens joyously taking off their masks in an inspirational scene of celebration.
We can come together. We just have to be social in new ways, and we have tools in our hands and on our desks that allow us to continue working, socializing and learning. Humans are most creative and resilient when pushed.
I have been using virtual tools for decades and have been teaching groups how to move their content, meetings or gatherings online. It has been thrilling, engaging, and so astonishing to see that once you get used to seeing yourself on a screen (and it IS weird at first), pretty soon the screens start to fall away and what you have left, is magic.
I have led global groups online who often forget they have never met in person. I have led women's groups using a cluster of virtual tools that allowed us to experience large group events, rituals, meditations and then lots of video conversations in the time between.
These are people I never would have known if I didn't use these virtual tools. They are people I treasure. I have a long distance beloved relationship that flourishes using a creative menagerie of virtual connection points throughout the day. You can do the same. I promise. Studies have already demonstrated that support groups who had met virtually had almost identical outcomes as those who drove to a single location. Let’s explore a few tools I love to bring your loved ones close.
WhatsApp- Most have it downloaded, but have you used it creatively? WhatsApp allows you to text, call and have video conference with anyone anywhere in the world. Only one person at a time, so use it for those special one-on-one connections. Kick the tires and use all of the features. Record a good-night message to each other every night. Take pictures and send them over. Use the attachment to share funny video clips. Call by audio, call by video and chat while doing the dishes or making breakfast.
Marco Polo- This little mobile app allows for asynchronous video conversations between two people or a group. Once it is downloaded in your phone, you can simply push a button and start chatting. The camera POV can change and it is a great tool to use when taking a walk to chat a bit, then turn the camera to show what the weather looks like, or maybe to show off a pretty flower blooming at the neighbor’s house. Groups can use it to share thoughts, emotions or reflections.
Loom- This little video app is used on your desktop and is easy to download. Once it is, any particular screen you are on that you may want to reference, simply click the Loom icon, and a tiny video circle of your pops up. It can be moved around on the screen and is a fantastic way to communicate more quickly than typing, as well as referencing your screen. As soon as you click the button to finish, a link is automatically copied to your clipboard to paste in an email, Slack, etc.
Zoom- Get your entire family, team, house of worship or bingo group together on Zoom. Their free account allows for a group of up to 100 to meet for 45 minutes free, or their affordable pro account then allows for unlimited time. The possibilities are as vast as your imagination. The gallery view feature allows for 25 screens to be seen at once. Get creative! Have you team meetings so everyone can SEE each other. Get the family together from around the world and share a meal together. Set up virtual cocktail parties, tea parties, card games and learning circles.
The world is a very small place, really. We are all so much more alike than we are different. One of the unforeseen benefits of mass population being forced home is the pollution levels in China and Italy have dropped dramatically. We are all taking a rest, even our precious Mother Earth.
Use the time imaginatively. Use it mindfully. Continue your women’s groups, men’s groups, wine clubs, poker nights- just do it online. Let those you care about SEE you as if we were in close quarters.
We retain 95% of information or communication when it is delivered visually, vs. only 10% when it is written. Use these tools to transform how you navigate your professional and social circles, not just now, but even after the social distancing is a welcome thing of the past.
